Thursday, February 24, 2011

Good crazy!

I could go through life being quite and demure.  Those of you who know me, would think this to be impossible and utterly ridiculous more me to try.  This would be sad to live from the place of trying to be a certain way that I am not.  I know for some, being themselves comes naturally but for me at times it wasn't.  Now I am just blasting the fullness of my free spirit and I'm holding on for the wild ride to come.  I'm letting the good crazy out.  

In my beautiful brain, I have great new ideas popping up as I let go of dramas.  If you choose to change your thought patterns from victim-this is wrong, that is wrong...blah, blah, blah.  It is not that you don't have an absolute right to think whatever you want, it's that whatever you focus on-you create more of.  When something isn't going well, you know you don't want...that now you know what you do want.  Talk and think about what you do want and see what happens.  I use my imagination to think about all the awesome things that can happen, appreciation for what I have, and enjoying whatever I am doing.  Dwell in the possibilities...I love that.  

I focus on FUN=and I am the acronym Queen so here's some that come to mind because I focus on it.  

Living the HIGH Vibration life

Living my JOY everyday




Opportunity for
Wild &Wonderful

No one told you had to be serious, let your silly hand out.  I've been called weird...and not just by my teenager.  All is well.  

It's so fun to play with words and I love to name everything.  I've always been obsessed with names.  That's why I love naming my fictional characters.  Listen, I'll name your car, your plant, your computer ...if you want.  Because...why not?  My husband's name is Brian but I have nicknamed him Breoni Pepperoni...get your mind outta the gutter.  It's funny!  B Love or B Money, like a rapper but really because I like the energy of it.  Even as a kid, I would make everyone's name into an acronym.  It's a gift.  LOL  My initials are JP= Just Perfect, Joyous Pretty, Jazzy Peaceful.   

Words have power to make us feel a certain way.  Just like the=the next time some asks you how you are, even if it's so-so...say-Peach keen, jellybean.  Well, you don't have to say that but tell the highest version you can of your reality. Make a theme for your dinner, your party, your day.  Wear a cool hat.  Be more colorful in your house, your life, your clothes.   Above YOURSELF and let others be themselves.  Accepting others means you accept yourself.  Next time you see someone who seems to jusge you so much, know that they are not allowing themselves to be themselves.  Tell them it's okay to let their freak flag fly.  they'll love that! 

Silly and fun worth it. It's the good crazy.  ;p



Saturday, February 19, 2011

"Oh, no she didn't!"

~We all have a story we tell about our lives and especially what is going on right now.  I decided to write this yesterday and I was feeling really good. Then I argued with my daughter and went into the drama with her.  I played victim, which I abhor.  In reality, we teach people how to treat us.  Anyway, I was focusing on what I did not want.  Duh...that's silly to stay there, you never find solutions there.  Today, I writing this and I am back to me.  The me I have made for myself is much more fun.  I chose to have a life that is happy, fun, meaningful, magical, enlightened and creating the feeling of it, regardless of what is going on.  (This is most of the time-but come on, I'm human-I can still get mad for a moment, if I choose.) 

~You can lead a life of, "Oh, no she didn't"-where people are doing things to you constantly.  You can call it "Oh no she didn't" list or you can have a shit list.  My Dad would tell me that I was on his shit list, in my teens. LOL  It's a glass half empty list, the woe is me list, life sucks because list, I have every right to be unhappy list, and you would be half right to have these list.  Everyone can tell their life story through a negative lists like these.  You can list how people have done you wrong.  Your parents didn't love you enough, your lover left you, your kids don't listen to you, your coworkers don't respect you, your friend was mean to you-yes.  Life was bad to you because you didn't win the spelling bee in 3rd grade, you didn't get the job you wanted, you are fat, you don't have enough money, your house needs repairs, you couldn't have the life you wanted-yes.  You screwed up in college, you yell at your kids too much, you aren't good enough at this...this...and this, you did this wrong in whatever-yes.  You are totally free to keep a tally of all these things. can think a different way.

~Thinking from a different perspective can happen without a tragedy for you to APPRECIATE what is good.  It doesn't mean that things can't be improved or you are settling.  With the energy that goes into a gratitude list will create more good things to be grateful for.  I like the word appreciation rather that gratitude because it feels better but- to each, his own.  I use to find all that was wrong and I shifted to trying to see the bright side.  I don't even feel the need to include certain things in my life story because there is no value to it.  You get to chose how you tell your story.  Right now, I rent my home.  I could feel bad that I don't own a home yet but that is pointless to me.  I have a happy list of life.  You could really split it up three ways if you want.  1.  Life has been good to me or life is good because...  2.  People have been good to me people are great be...  3.  I did this right or I totally rock because...  You will feel wonderful if you do this a strive to live from this place.  Even remembering how you felt on a vacation will make you feel fabulous and you can add that to your list.   

~There is a lot working in your life, if you are kind enough to yourself to look for it.  Loving yourself is not about your ego, it's about your spirit.  Being a spiritual person means being close to God, by feeling the Divine inside of you-accepting your worthiness of the love.  Beaming light and love from your being-into life means being JOYOUS!  This is what I want for my life and it makes me happy.  You can have whatever relationship you want with God.  It's so cool, we get to choose!  How other people see me, my life, or God is up to them.  I get to chose what I want for myself and how I get to feel about it.  No one can make you feel anything you don't want to.  Yay!  We have the power.  

~Luckily I have figured to become more authentic everyday in how I live.  I use to have a really hard time being myself-I was so concerned with what others thought.  What I know for sure now is that I know what is right for me and being positive is my thing.  I am writing my life the way I want.  Yes, things have gone wrong, I have made mistakes, but who cares?  Life starts over everyday.  And you can think differently by leaning into where you want to be.  Every day, you can get happier-starting thought by thought.  I think happy thoughts as much as possible.  I see my life as quite magical.  In making mistakes in my life, it led me to know myself better and really appreciate the things that I value.  I have amazing parents, wonderful husband, beautiful kids, and incredible friends.  I have had super cool vacations, I have a rockin' navy minivan, and I always have money to feed my kids, a great house to live in, and fantastic stuff in it to boot.  I also decided I was writing a book without any writing background whatsoever and you get to choose where you steer your life.  My absolute wish for all of you is for you to get out of life what you want.  Start seeing glass half full, life is good, tell your good-life story, and see things change.  Above all-Follow your bliss!  xoxo    

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Fast track to know yourself is to have a kid ;p

The most sure fire way to figure out who you are is to have a child.  There are many ways to discover who you are. You can learn from any relationship really...cause it brings up your stuff.  You learn when you teach, always.  When you have kids, it shakes up everything in a good way.  You have this baby and you realize what is most important to you has changed.  You look at the world with different eyes and your own parents-way differently.  You cherish this new being and the idea of family shifts and all of sudden you are the one organizing family get-togethers instead of trying to get out of them. It isn't just about you anymore and you put the focus into this Babyworld.  Simultaneously, you join Mommyworld, which even though there are many maps, you have to navigate it yourself.  In this new land, there are rules to you or not, schedules, breastfed or not, etc.  Guess what, half the time, it doesn't matter.  It's about being happy and confident in what you decide.  If someone gets mad or adamant about how to do things, it's about them.  I have had four kids and done things different each time but really I decided what worked for me.  Lesson there is: listen to your instincts, your intuition, your own voice.

Your little cherub starts growing and you see so does your love, each day making your heart's capacity for love-way more than you thought humanly possible.  Then they start doing things, which is so cute, leading every day towards toddlerhood.  You think you are laid back and there comes toddler defiance and huge messes.  What happened to my angel face little child?  The best is when they do this in the store, people watch it like it's a televised sport.  I found that this stage I was so alarmed with my anger inside, shattering my idea that I had to be like the Blessed Mother all the time. It is normal but I had some expectations for myself and if I yelled, I'd beat myself up.  I am still not a Zen Buddha master but I choose know to shift my attitude whenever I can. It was too tiring feeling like I was slaying dragons all the time.  I would want to control the situation (screaming tantrum-throwing child), I would get mad but that didn't help.  I would get embarrassed in public, which didn't help, I would threaten which still sometimes works.  I have to set boundaries somehow.  The sanest way to deal with this is no matter what, draw your energy way from the conflict, surrender, let go and let God (it's all the same). The lovely thing kids will teach you is that when it's over- they move on and don't beat themselves up for what happened an hour ago.  They say, "I love you," and your heart swells with unconditional love again.  At this stage, you realize you forgot about yourself and need to make yourself a priority again. 

As they grow, they start asking questions and you have to start telling them about your whole perspective on life.  Sometimes you tell them something and as the world come out of your mouth, you realize you don't even believe them.   You say the world is a dangerous place but people are nice.  Weird?  "Believe in yourself" and then you think...WOW...I don't really believe in myself.  "You have to forgive others because you want them to forgive you."  Hmm...who have I not forgiven, I'll send them Love & Light.  "No one can make you happy and it is not my job to make you happy" (with candy, soda, getting your way) and ding, ding, ding-I am responsible for my OWN happiness.  "We are so lucky, kids and should be so grateful for what I have."  Am I grateful or complaining?  Do we practice what we preach.  It's so funny what hypocrites we can be.  It is wonderful where we can see where we can make adjustments to our lives, no stress, it's about personal growth.  What about God?  Teaching them that to believe, honor, love to believe, honor, and love yourself.  You are a Divine creation, act like it.  Ultimately, no one can really tell you what to think or believe, and would you really want a robot for a child?  At this point, they can start getting fresh or flip with their mouth but in the next minute-they say something really heartwarming and profound, you are so proud of who your child is becoming.  Lesson here:  Balance is the key to life and you keep learning every day. 

Heading into the teens, everything you learned is out the window except love and respect.  This means letting them be individuals while setting boundaries.  As each new situation, that you have never deal with before comes up, you deal with it as it comes.  Remember all the mistakes you made and you turned out normal, well normal is boring anyway.  You pulled away from your parents, it's not personal, even if it hurts.  You gotta let them become their own person.  Let them find their talents and natural abilities because you not only want successful kids but HAPPY kids. You also realized, a long time ago, not to make too many statement like: "I would never let my child, that kid is bad, that Mom is doing is wrong."  When you see yourself making too many judgments, look within and you'll see you make a lot of them in response to yourself.  If you really love and accept yourself, you find less need to worry about what others are doing.  I am infamous for saying, "I want don't want to argue" and I just keep arguing.  If you want to have peace in your house, be the example.  It's kind of freeing to not have to be right all the time.  Because it's not about winning, who is smarter, your own race-aim for your own personal best.   In all relationships, it's best to take the high road, it's got a beautiful view.  All parents do it differently, you pave your own way each time, just like in the rest of your life. Tend to your own garden and watch your flowers grow.

I know each day, I get wiser on the parenting journey and am so glad I am learning through my kids about myself.  You can't hold onto the past, when they were younger, you have to look for the joy in watching them bloom.  Have as much fun as you can.  Kids are messy but they are worth it.  They'll show you how to look at the world with wonder and to P-L-A-Y!  Look and see, there are lessons everyday, everywhere, to help you find yourself.  Self discovery bring peace, love, joy, among many other things, definitely don't take it too seriously.  Relax. Send you all Love & Light, wishing you an easy, fulfilling, wonderful journey!  :)

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

The Haze Maze

WOW, do I feel good!  After having a sinus infection where my ears, throat, and head felt awful-I feel the haze is gone and I am even clearer.  It was a weird process where I resisted feeling bad, feeling foggy in my brain and like I had zero energy except to heal-to then waking up to life again.  I had to piece everything back together and figure out if my life needed any adjustments.  Yes, I have to do the laundry, feed the kids, and all that but is my schedule flowing well towards what I want or do I need to make changes.  It gave me perspective to know how I want to feel and even reminded me how much I want to achieve goals and make all my dreams come true.  I actually learned a lot.  After I got out of the maze I was in for a few days. 

The introspective thoughts were fleeting because I was in a haze and while I was feeling self-pity and lousy, whatever I thought about seemed dim.  It was the Law of Attraction at work.  If I was focused on things that were wrong, I found more things and blocks to clear in my path.  I just must have needed a mini-pity party.  My pity party was drinking tea and reading a book, nothing big, because I know I have so many wonderful things to be grateful for in my life.  I use to throw pity parties for myself all the time, dreading going to grocery store, worrying about money, or bitching about belly fat. I wonder if you really did throw an official pity party-if you should wear drab clothes, serve crappy food, and listen to sad love songs.  Hehe-funny picture to me!  I would rsvp NO to that one. 

Even though I didn't feel good, I was grateful for having the doctor get me right in, that I have insurance, prescription plan, and I love living from a place of gratitiude for what I DO have, which compared to the rest of the world is pretty darn fabulous.  I kept working on feeling better on all levels and knew-this too shall pass-and I'd go back to how awesome I usually feel most of the time.  I needed to rest my mind and my body, although I read a great book, which made me forget I was sick for a while.  It also confirmed how much I love to write, read, words, and characters, going to different worlds that books can take you to.  I want my book to take people somewhere, make them meet cool people, make them feel things and have them get something out of it.  I most of all want people top feel good which is my mission in life.  And no...not because I'm a reformed people-pleaser.  Because I like to feel good, that's why!

Singing loud in the car, even when my throat hurt, was helpful to my spirit...and getting back to the higher vibration I like to be at.  I happen to hear a song on the radio that brought me back to when I was younger, it's crazy how you can jump back in time and you feel the emotions all over again.  Well, the same can be for the future.  You could play a song and really think about great things happening that you want and every time you listen to it-feel good.  It's not the song, it's the energy attached to it-how it makes you feel.  If you want to feel good, do things that make you feel good, talk about things that make you feel good, watch things that make you feel good, listen to things that make you feel good, eat things that make you feel good-live from that place.  If you can come from the place of feeling good most of the time, being grateful for something we take for granted every day-our health, then everything improves.  External things don't have to change to make us happy, it's from the inside out. 

Life can feel like a haze maze sometimes.  Not like a real maze-which I am not fond of-I'm not the one to follow in one of them.  You'll never get out.  :)  Often at some point in our life, we ask what am I doing, what direction should I go in, we are always making or going through changes in life.  If we can focus on the good-feeling stuff or what good things we do become clearer and you see it's not really a maze.  When we are looking at our problems, the maze is all in your head and really opening is right there if we can readjust our vision.  Whatever you focus on you create more of.  Make a list of things you are grateful for everyday and you will see that how you "see" things will be different.  

I am grateful for all of you that are taking the time to read this.
Enjoy life!
Love & Light to all!  xoxo